The lost art of honor

Honor-a lost art

Honoring my husband

Kathleen Maxwell-Rambie

copyright May 2018

Years ago, I helped host an art reception with several other ladies to honor a local artist. This artist had graciously donated some of her work to the business I worked for. We decided to honor her contribution to our nonprofit and to our our community for her artistic talent. 

 After the reception, I was visiting with one of the other hostesses and she made the comment, that honor is a lost art in our society and culture. Somehow, our society has slowly drifted away from this character trait. I had to agree.

Honor is defined as giving high respect or esteem to someone or something; a person or thing that brings credit to something. Romans 12:10 instructs us by saying, “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.”(NIV) 

The word honor in this passage actually means “precious.” Do you look at those around you as something precious?

What are some ways we can honor those around us? 

First off, by speaking to them. I witnessed something the other day that was dishonoring. Two people were talking in a business conversation and a third person walked in and interrupted the conversation. He spoke to one lady and gave her a directive but totally ignored the other woman. One of the most disrespectful things you can do to someone, is to ignore them or give them the silent treatment. People who do this, only show their own insecurity and their own immaturity. 

 Another way to honor others is by how we speak to them. My dryer broke and I was dealing with the repair for 6 weeks. The wrong parts were ordered twice, the company had to cancel the appointment several times for internal issues, and then the second service man forgot to order the correct part he needed! 

Needless to say, I was not real happy with the situation. As I talked to Customer Solutions, I was challenged to speak kindly to the woman on the phone as I pleaded my case. I can’t say it was easy, as I really wanted to give her a piece of my mind. Honoring her as a person, who is trying to do a good job, got me further than giving her a piece of my mind and I know, honored God.

Showing honoring to others raises their value. It picks them up and elevates them. It is a deposit in their bank instead of a withdrawal. Honoring someone blesses them. 

Philippians 2:3 says, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.” (NIV) 

Imagine if we were constantly affirming one another for their contribution to our families, churches, organizations, etc. Honoring others above ourselves is a directive from scripture. The Bible is so good at showing us how to live well.

National Day of Prayer

One of my all time favorite scriptures is Psalms 8:4 and 5. It says, “What is man that your are mindful of him and the son of man that you care for him? You made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor.” (NIV)

In this scripture, God esteems you and me. He honors us for simply being who we are. His honor is bestowed upon us. God almighty honors you! He has given you a crown of glory and validates you, as being important. He even gives you and me a crown. It is his way of saying, “Hey world- this is someone of value!” 

This passage transformed how I personally thought about myself years ago. My personal self esteem was pretty low at the time, and one morning in my quite time I read Psalms 8. I suddenly saw that God almighty saw me as a woman of value. I had the choice to throw away the way I felt about myself and trade my thoughts for God’s. What about you? Do you need to toss some of your thoughts about yourself and see yourself as a person of value.

To take that passage to another level, if God honors the person next to us, we should  honor them too? How do you treat those in your home? Let me challenge your thinking. How can you give something to someone if you don’t have it yourself? If you have trouble honoring others, perhaps it is because you don’t have a high regard for yourself. To lift them up, would only make you feel worse about yourself. Perhaps that is why some people struggle with honoring others.

 Honor is a character trait that people in royalty practice. I have no doubt that honor is everywhere in heaven. Why?  In scripture, God honored Jesus. Jesus honored his Father God and Jesus and God highly honored the work of the Holy Spirit. Each one valued the others function higher than their own. Do you honor others in your church, in your work place for the work they do? Do you tell them how much you appreciate them?

Lt. Commander Austin Maxwell

Honor looks for what a person does right, not wrong. I think often times, Christians are too judgmental of others. The truth is, if we were walking in their shoes, we might do the very same thing.

With this being Memorial Day Weekend, I would like to honor not only those that have given their lives for our country. Many thanks to those that sacrificed years of their life, so we can live in a country with many freedoms.

I also want to honor the spouses, sons and daughters, fathers and mothers of those that  went to war. They sacrificed for us too and I want to say thank you to them and honor them. And to all those that were left with their lives in pieces from a loss, I ask God to bless you in many ways and heal your hearts. 

Collins and her daddy

 I have discovered that I need to do better at honoring those around me. Honor may be a lost art but you and I can begin to change our society and community by honoring those around us. It has to start somewhere, why not with me and you? 

Kathleen Maxwell-Rambie is a native of the Hill Country. She is passionate about helping others to discover their value and worth. You can contact her at kathleenmaxwell1@gmail.com or visit her blog at www.themaxwellminutes.blogspot.com

Encouragement for Mothers

Kathleen Maxwell-Rambie

May 2018 copyright

Mother’s Day Encouragement

My mom-Mary Belle Jones

My mother was a 5’2, blue-eyed lady that taught me many things. She taught me everything from “say please and thank you” and “don’t forget to wear your lipstick” to “ you better shape up or ship out”  and there was always, “get happy just like you got sad.” 

She loved to dress up and was frequently seen wearing high heels even though she was a stay at home mom. 

 Mary Belle loved people and would talk to anyone that would listen.  She was a genuine lady and tried her best to teach me how to be a lady…I’m still learning.

The best things my mom taught me were about walking with God. She loved the Lord and it was evident by the many times I would see her studying her Bible, listening to worship music and by the life she led. 

She was a woman that loved God with all her heart and she was a praying woman. I am forever grateful for all the prayers she prayed for me and all the wise counsel she gave me.

Austin - my oldest son and me Mother's Day

My mom had a passion to tell people about Jesus and was a children’s church leader at Grace Bible Chapel for years. She led countless kids to the Lord throughout her years of ministry. She taught me how to share the gospel and to reach out to share the love of Jesus with other. 

She left his earth five years ago but not before she was able to leave me a great legacy. 

Mary Belle was not a perfect mom and I did not always agree with her but she was a good mother.  

Perhaps you are reflecting on your own mother this weekend. Good memories, bad memories, funny ones - God word is very specific on how to treat our parents. 

Ephesians 6:2 says, “ Honor your father and mother - which is the first commandment with a promise - that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy a long life on the earth.” (NIV). 

I found eight times in scripture where God tells us to honor our father and mother, which indicates that it is pretty important to the heart of God. 

Deuteronomy 27:16 tells us, “Cursed is the man who dishonors his father or his mother.” (NIV) We can actually bring difficulty upon ourselves when we dishonor our parents. 

So what does that mean to us today? You do not have to like everything your mom did or did not do, but you do have to honor the God given position she has in your life. If nothing else, you can be grateful your mom carried you in her womb and gave birth to you.

Price and Halie's wedding-my youngest son

 Ask God to show you things you can be thankful for concerning your mom, the things she did do right. Otherwise, as the scripture says, it will not go well with you in your life. Honoring our mother is not just a suggestion but a commandment with a promise. When we honor our mom, we receive a blessing!

My late husband did a great job of training our kids to honor me as their mother. Each Mother’s Day, he would take them shopping to buy something for me, had them make me a card - because cards mean a lot to me - and would get them up early to make me breakfast in bed. 

Fathers, I challenge you to teach your children to honor their mom. It is your responsibility.

Maybe your mom had some problems and hurt you in some ways emotionally or physically- or both.

  I have counseled many people that have bitterness and resentment towards their mother. Unfortunately, those thoughts and feelings hold the person, not the mother, in bondage. 

My three kids

If your mom has hurt you, let you down, not been there for you, made wrong choices, do yourself a favor and forgive her this Mother’s Day. Forgiveness truly is a gift you give to yourself as much as to her. You do not have to tell her you forgive her, rather, it can just be a conversation between you and God.

Perhaps your biological mom is not around any longer and there is another woman in your life that is like a mom. When my mom got Parkinson's Disease and dementia, there was another woman that became my “other mother” as I call her.  I am forever grateful for her guidance, love and presence in my life. 

Some of the girls I've been a spiritual mom to

There are many women that have never given birth that have found ways in which to serve as mothers to others.  Never underestimate the value of being a presence in someones life and do not forget to thank those that have been like a mom to you. They are God’s gift to you. 

I have many people that call me “Mom” that I did not give birth to,  but for whom I’ve tried to be there for them in their lives. I know God has put me in their lives to invest in them.

If you are a young mom, I want to encourage you to enjoy - find the joy - in every stage of mothering. I raised three children and sometimes the days seemed like they would never end. Someone always needed something from me and often times I struggled to balance work, each child’s needs, discipline, training and teaching them about how to walk with God. 

There were times I would  laugh and say to my friends, “where do I turn in my mother button?” My children are now 37, 33, and 28 and those long mothering days are over and it is such a joy to see the fruit of my labor in their lives today. 

Training your children to walk with God is  one of the most important things you can do for your child because you will not always be with them but God will.

 I challenge you to make teaching them scripture, teaching them to pray, and teaching them how to walk with God a priority. There is no grater joy than to see your grown kids walk with God and teach their own children - your grandchildren about Jesus.

Motherhood is not easy but it is worth it. One of the scriptures that kept me going and that I would pray over myself during the long days of mothering was Proverbs 31:25  It says, “She is clothed with strength and dignity and she can laugh at the days to come.”

 I pray this for each mother this Mother’s Day and pray this Mother’s Day will be a healing time for all. 

All my kids!

Happy Mother’s Day Month!

Kathleen Maxwell-Rambie is a native of the Hill Country. She is passionate about helping others to discover their value and worth. You can contact her at kathleenmaxwell1@gmail.com or visit her blog at www.themaxwellminutes.blogspot.com

You are special, important and loved!

You are special, important and loved

April 2018 newspaper article

copyright 2018

Kathleen Maxwell-Rambie

My big sons! Love them so.

Working from my computer trying to finish a grant, Becca, a three year old, came and stood right beside me. I was working from home, due to the weather, and the bright eyed little girl came with her mom, who was working on a project at my house. 

As she stood there watching me, I stopped and hugged her and said, “Always remember Becca, you are special, you are important and you are loved. Can you say that?” I asked. 

She repeated with me as best she could but some of those words were hard to get out, “I am special, I am important and I am loved.” She beamed as she finished. 

I wanted to seize the moment with her and plant some seeds of truth in her life about how God feels about her. Actually, that is how he feels about each one of us.

 Deuteronomy 7:6 states, “For you are a people holy to the Lord your God. The Lord your God has chosen you out of all the peoples on the face of the earth to be his people, his treasured possession.” (NIV) You are special, do not ever forget it! Each of us can choose to believe this but we need to take the next step and act like we are special to the Lord.

 Our belief system shapes our actions. Believing comes first, and then our actions will follow. When I began understanding this concept, I had to actually say to myself and God, “I choose as an act of my will to believe I am special and chosen by God.”

When we begin to act like we are special to the Lord, understand we are chosen and valuable, it shows that we really understand God’s love for us. Do you see yourself as special to the Lord?

Your life matters to others and the kingdom of God. Each of us has a responsibility to keep growing in our character and understanding of the important role God has called us to. Everyone matters and no one is discounted.

 I Corinthians 12: 18 tells us, “ But God has placed the members, each one of them, in the body, just as He has desired.” (NIV) 

Each of us has important talents. Do not try to be like someone else; be who God made you to be. You are shaped and designed by Him for important purposes. Do you see yourself as important and live your life like you are important? If not, ask God to open your eyes to how valuable you are.

When Becca began to say, “I am loved,” she stumbled over the words. They were hard to get out of her mouth. Becca is not alone. I struggled with feeling loved by God because I looked at my inadequacies and life circumstances instead of the truth of God’s word. 

 Believing God loves us is an act of faith. Galatians 5: 6 says, “The only thing that counts, is faith expressing itself through love.” (NIV). 

God has demonstrated His love for us in so many different ways. By faith, each of us must receive that love from Him. Once we choose to believe we are loved by Him, just the way we are, regardless of our faults, then we need to take the step of  truly living our lives as His much loved children.

Jeremiah 31:3 states, “I have loved you with an everlasting love and with loving kindness I have drawn you.” (NIV)  God’s love is built to last, will not give up on you and will continue to draw you. Ask Him to show you that love.

In John 15:9  Jesus shows us His love and challenges us. “ As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love.”  We are commanded to remain  or sit and stay in His love. That means to me we are to constantly move throughout our day in an awareness of His love for us. Remaining in His love keeps us safe in the storms of life.

I challenge you to repeat these words to yourself this week. I am special, I am  important and I am loved. Ask God to open your eyes to your value and worth. And ask him to give you a greater understanding of His great love for you.

Kathleen Maxwell is a native of the Hill Country, a writer and speaker. She is passionate about helping others discover the joy of walking with God and their value. You can contact her at kathleenmaxwell1@gmail.com and on her blog www.themaxwellminutes.blogspot.com

Overcoming-A fabulous Easter gift

Overcoming-A fabulous Easter gift

Kathleen Maxwell-Rambie

March 2018

copyright

Have you ever thought of how people in heaven see you and how God sees you in situations?  About eight years ago, I felt God challenging me with this question as I found myself in the middle of great loss and feeling weaker than I had ever felt in my life.  

My view of the situation and being a relatively young widow was not positive, to say the least.  It seemed to me all my dreams of what I thought life would be in this season were washed away.  I realized if I continued seeing my life in a negative light, it would lead me down a path I really did not want to go down.  So I began to ask God how He, and the rest of heaven saw me and my life. 

 He took me to I John 5:4 which states, “whatever is born of God overcomes the world.  Who is he who overcomes the world but he who believes Jesus is the son of God.” (NIV) That scripture states that as children of God, overcoming power resides in us to overcome any situation we face. 

Jesus overcame the grave and conquered death. He rose above his circumstances. The definition of overcoming is: to get the better of, to get the victory over.  I felt God say, “Kathleen, I see you as an overcomer.  You have my power within you to overcome the heartache you feel.  You have a God given right to get the better of this situation and make a profit from it.”  

That was not exactly how I saw my situation and ask God to change my thinking to see myself as an overcomer.  I knew that only God can heal my heart, and I also knew I had choices.

Eight pound bass I caught in El Salto Mexico
Fishing-Part of my new life

John 16:32 says, “In the world you will have tribulation but take courage; I have overcome the world.”(NIV)  The word for tribulation here is translated as pressure.  Yes, this world brings plenty of pressure!

 Jesus says we will have trouble in this world but not to stress about it because His power in us will help us to make a profit from any trouble. God is too good to let us encounter problems without providing the provision for us.  I have discovered that life is more about finding the provision in tribulation instead of fixing the problem.  

I John 4:4 says, “You dear children are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.”(NIV) 

 Nothing is greater than the power of God in us to overcome in any situation.  You and I never have to settle for defeat.  The power to overcome is more powerful than any force that comes against us!  Now that is good news!

Jesus gave his all to his disciples and those around him. He loved when I’m sure he did not want to but did out of obedience to God. Then some of them turned against him, complained, betrayed and help crucify him. He overcame the grave, he is an overcomer, and we are made in His image; therefore, overcoming power resides in us. Overcoming is God’s Easter gift to us and part of the new life he gives to us.

Sometimes our overcoming looks different  and takes longer than we might think. Making a profit from a difficult situation is often seen in growth in our character. Who are we and how do we show up when the cards are stacked against us? 

My dear friends

Other times, overcoming  and healing can take a long while. A number of years ago, there was a rift in a relationship with a dear friend. I kept trusting God to heal the relationship and prayed that truth would come to heal the friendship. A few years ago, my friend came to me and began to share a personal experience they had encountered that opened their eyes. They now saw things differently from how they saw it years ago and stated they admired my character and how I walked through the situation. The words were healing to my soul and my heart smiled at God’s goodness, healing and overcoming power. Overcoming took much longer than I liked, but it finally came.

This  Easter season is your new beginning to begin to enjoy and walk in the overcoming power Jesus provides. Begin today by asking Jesus to come into your heart and ask Him to open your eyes to the overcoming power that is in you. If you know Christ, I challenge you to daily ask God to show you situations through his eyes and wear your overcoming clothes. You are not a victim, you are an overcomer. We have an awesome opportunity to grow in our walk with him and our character. He overcame his adversity so you and I can overcome things that come against us. Overcoming is God’s Easter gift to each of us-so let’s receive it and enjoy it!

Kathleen Maxwell-Rambie, a native of the Hill Country, is passionate about helping others discover their value and worth. She can be contacted at kathleenmaxwell1@gmail.com or on her blog, www.themaxwellminutes.blogspot. com

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Wearing the right thing makes you look good

Kathleen Maxwell-Rambie

March 2018

copyright 2018

My youngest son-Price

     A good friend and I were talking the other day and she asked,  “Kathleen, what are you going to wear? “  We were talking about a function we planned to attend together soon, and were working out the major details when that seemingly common question popped up.

      “I don’t know,” I replied, “I haven’t planned that far ahead.”  

      Women always ask other women that question  and I feel it is because we don’t want to wear something that is inappropriate.

      Personally, I am not someone that plans what to wear too far ahead. I might think about what I am going to wear for the day as I am fixing my hair and walking to my closet. 

      The day after I was asked the question, I came across a scripture that made me think about that question again. The scripture was, Colossians 3:12, which states, “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them together in perfect unity.” (NIV) 

      I love the fact that God thinks of everything. In his wisdom, he even instructs us about what to wear! Scripture shows us that these virtues will always make us look good. 

Kiss before he gets married!

     Compassion, which is concern for the suffering or misfortune of others, is vital for each of us. How good are you at showing compassion to others? I recently had someone contact me that had lost someone they loved. There were choices in this person’s life I couldn’t agree with, but my heart went out to this individual because his heart was broken. I had a perfect opportunity to take time and show him the love of God and express concern for his suffering. I wanted to be a safe place for this young adult to express his grief. I know my own personal suffering has developed a greater compassion within me and I am much quicker to wear compassion these days.

     Kindness is the quality of being friendly, generous or considerate. Did you realize when you smile, you are being kind to others? Be sure and wear your smile today and watch how it affects those around you. Smiling can actually make you look younger, so if you are middle aged, it is a must wear garment. Being kind and considerate is being careful not to cause inconvenience or hurt to another.

     Being generous is giving more of something than is expected or necessary.. I am personally going to make sure I wear this more often as I realize I sometimes forget.

My beautiful new daughter-Halie

     Humility is a modest view of ones own importance. Everyone looks good when they wear this character trait. Pride is a common thief that works hard to steal our humility. There is nothing wrong with a feeling of satisfaction with an accomplishment. That is not pride. It is an accomplishment to earn a degree, win a race, or get a promotion. Wearing humility, enables us to honor others making them feel just as valued and important even above our own accomplishment. All that we have and all that we are is because of God’s grace in our lives. Yes, our choices make a difference but for those that call on God, we must remember that it is Him that enables us. Remembering that fact helps keep me in my place. Sometimes I forget that fact and self righteousness or  pride can strip me of the garment of humility. Scripture says to humble ourselves and God will lift us up. It is up to us to put on the garment of humility.

This week, I challenge you to examine your wardrobe. God gives us the most important things to wear and when we choose from God’s  wardrobe, we will always look like a million dollars. 

Kathleen Maxwell-Rambie is a native of the Hill Country, a writer and speaker. She is passionate about helping others to discover their value and worth. You can contact her at kathleenmaxwell1@gmail.com or visit her blog at www.themaxwellminutes.blogspot.com