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An Honest Account of Love, Grief and Walking With God
Finding God's Goodness in Life's Disappointments

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Dancing Cheek to Cheek

I am fully confidant that God is writing the pages of my story in life.  The melody has changed, therefore, it is a new song and rhythm.  For whatever reason, my life dancing partner is gone and I have had to "change partners and dance." I am determined to keep dancing through life.  I know heaven is full of dancing and celebration so I feel I have a God given right to dance now and celebrate even though I didn't want the melody and song to end.  In the Lord's prayer, Jesus says, "on earth as it is in heaven." therefore, I will keep  trying to follow the melody of His grace.

 Joe gave me a figure years a few years back that I think was prophetic.  The saying on it said, "When you reach for your dreams your soul dances."  He gave it to me when I went to Thailand to speak.  Then a dear friend gave me another figurine of a beautiful girl dancing.  I believe that is who I am becoming.  It is a season of learning to dance cheek to cheek with Jesus.  I know that sounds a little cheesy but it is true.  I love getting lost in worshiping God and dancing with Him.  Read the Psalms...David danced so radically his clothes fell off!  I will keep mine on!

I continue to take little steps forward in the things that are my dreams.  I loved going to Baytown to speak at a Baptist Church Ladies Night.  There were 115 ladies there and a number of them came up to me afterwards and said the message was just for them.  Several spoke through their tears and I loved seeing God restore their dignity and worth.  Satan is a thief and I see too often he has robbed the body of Christ by convincing people to get their identity in something other than Christ.  Thanks to all of you who prayed for that event.  Things didn't really go as I expected but nothing else has in my life so I should be use to that!  I took a number of props to make the evening fun and yet mix truth in with the message.  What I saw though was the truth was hitting pretty hard and really making the women think.  It made me have to readjust.

This season of my life is a time when I feel like I am reinventing myself as I am coming out of the fog of grief.  I am discovering things about myself and love the freedom.  I continue to attend several writers groups and am learning much. I have a whole new group of friends too.  I have submitted some stories to magazines and continue to write 2 times a month for our local paper.  That has developed me and challenged me. God continues to encourage me to advance in the area of writing and speaking. Today I got several letters in the mail from two women that shared how much God had taught them personally from my writings. One even ordered all my CD's and my book. I felt so blessed and what a gift from God.  I saw this as God confirming I am on the right path and I needed the encouragement as it breeds courage.  He promised me in Psalms "I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go."  I hang on to that as I step into the unknown.  He promised to sustain me.  I will also be attending a Christian Writers Conference this weekend and am excited about the opportunities that await.

On a personal note, I was able to see my sweet daughter and son-in-law when I went to Houston.  I have really missed my girl. It is fun to see them making their own life together.  Price is out in the middle of the Gulf of Mexico on an off shore drilling rig this summer.  He is following the head engineer around and is working 12 hour days.  I know he is learning much. Austin and Laura have purchased a boat and are busy skiing, planting a garden and enjoying the East Coast.  I plan to go see them in July...well really I planed to see them in June but hit the wrong button when I booked the flight so now I am going in July!  It will be interesting to see why God wanted me here now and there later.  Planning does not work for me still!

My trip to California recently proved that I truly am advancing in the area of grief.  I had one day that I cried for about 3 minutes.  That was huge for me; but later that day I just felt angry.  As I pondered why, I realized that our last family vacation was to California and that there would never be another time like that for us.  Our family dynamics have changed...I never wanted them to, but change is here to stay, like it or not.

Dancing and Reinventing,

1 comment:

  1. You're dancing your way onto the stage called Titus 2 woman and we need you out there showing the young women that their worth is NOT in being a size 2. Here in America, that's our only worth. UNLESS someone like you and I come along and show them that the "counterfeit worth" is NOT God's plan for their lives. It's so much more than you could hope or dream! Way to go, Kathleen!