An Honest Account of Love, Grief and Walking With God
Finding God's Goodness in Life's Disappointments

Sunday, September 19, 2010

The Road of Life



September 19, 2010


Life in the natural is totally unpredictable, is full of delightful things as well as painful crisis. Trust me on this! The adventure of life is that each day we have the opportunity to discover what is around the corner. Some days the road is straight, predictable and simple…and we can handle it easily because we know the road. Other days we round the corner and our heart stops because we can’t see clearly, something wonderful is ahead, something totally unexpected is in the road or we have to take a detour. The challenge is always about how am I going to show up and respond when the unpredictable, painful and unforeseen happens? How do we navigate so things do not spin out of control or get on the wrong road? Anyone can totally fall apart, explode in anger or loose hope but it is in those times as believers in God we can choose a different way. I have discovered it is important to let love drive and navigate through the unexpected. It makes the twists and turns prettier…like the picture posted. What do I mean by letting love drive? It has been very important in the last 18 months of my life to rest in and step into the fact that above all God loves me dearly even though I have experienced the most painful days ever. Some days I do well at letting love navigate and other days not so good. In times past when the unpredictable happened I often tried to take control, became anxious, became self protective which always lead me down the wrong road. When things don’t look the way I think they should or I see the negative I have to ask God for His perspective of the situation-wait until my negative perspective changes and make sure I am choosing to love others and Him regardless of how they treat me or what I think should be happening in life. I frequently just sit in silence and have a simple conversation with God, “God I love you and open my heart to receive your love for me.” I always feel His presence with those words and am in stillness to receive. How often do you tell God you love Him each day? We all love to hear those words. Joe use to tell me 5 or 6 times a day that he loved me and I would tell him. Those words kept us connected as husband and wife. I miss hearing those words…but I’ve tried to tell God more daily that I love Him and open my heart to Him to give me the love I need. I challenge you to begin telling the Lord you love Him more and more each day.
Back to the road…there is the unexpected curve when someone says something hurtful or disappoints us. Our love for others is challenged in this place. I love what Graham Cooke says about that- “How do you love when love isn’t returned? The same ways you do when it is because real love loves anyway” I see so many in the body of Christ that only love when love is returned. It is shallow. Our love needs to be unconditional for others just like Jesus. God is love. It is who He is….it is who we are too…we just forget or choose to walk in performance love. My personal mission statement is: “To know the Father’s love and give it away.” God’s heart for me is to continually grow in understanding what real love really is so I will have more to give away. The more of God’s love we receive, meditate on and understand the better we are at loving others.

I am loving the days where there is a crispness in the air and those little signs that a new season is ahead. My week has been busy with extra things at work, walking a lot as I am training for a ½ marathon and trying to manage a home alone. It is much more difficult without a partner…but I am giving it my best shot. Last night was our CWJC BBQ and we had 125 people that braved the rain and came anyway. It was a fun cool evening under the pavilion at our city park. I am also preparing for a speaking engagement I have this next week for a women’s banquet in Grandbury. Please pray for me as I step back into things I am passionate about…helping women discover their value and worth. I will be speaking about the book I wrote and have now come out with a second edition. “Wake Up to Who You Are!” I sell them for $3.00 if anyone is interested as well as the CD.

On another note, I want to talk about someone that has been an incredible gift to me in the last 9 months. I am a verbal processor which means I need to talk myself into what I think and feel about situations. It is the way God made me. I met someone safe, out of state and has been someone that has constantly been there for me allowing me to process life and the grief- A fabulous listener and friend and I am very thankful for Lin and his kindness.

Walking in His love,

Kathleen

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