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An Honest Account of Love, Grief and Walking With God
Finding God's Goodness in Life's Disappointments

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Change and growth

The blessing keep coming each day. Friday Price came in for the weekend and I grilled him ribs. It was only the 2nd time I have cooked in is too much trouble for one person. We enjoyed a nice evening on the deck and then a movie. Saturday someone left a basket of soup fixings on my front porch...what a nice blessing and today I made the soup and sent some back with Price. Daily there are little blessings and I see God caring for me at every turn. Saturday I went to Boerne to have dinner with Rob's family. It was a nice evening but as I drove back to Kerrville alone I decided that after 33 years of having a date everywhere I went, driving home alone was not that much fun. I am adjusting more and more each day but am not too sure I like it. I finished a book this weekend called A Widow's Walk. There were several quotes in there that were good...."you have just experienced the ultimate sorrow in marriage." That is true. ...."when your mind is preoccupied with grief, you become careless or inattentive." I can say I have forgotten my keys, cell phone etc. the last few weeks. "The process of overcoming grief will cause you to change." A friend of ours said, "you can't grow without change, and you can't change without growth." Looks like I am in for some change and growth....that sounds like work to me...but staying the same is boring when you get down to it. Change causes us to grow. We should always be growing and my heart is to grow in intimacy with God. At the end of the day, it is my intimacy with the Father that is getting me through this season and gives me hope and joy.



  1. Embracing change is always a good thing and always a God thing. I have subscribed to your posts now so will receive them via email. Looking forward to them all. Walking with you through the changes.

  2. I would bet that you and Joe changed so much through the years with EACH OTHER at your side that it didn't feel quite a discombobulating as it does now. Plus, the change means that you are leaving Joe behind bit by bit. However, Joe is waiting for you up in Heaven, and God has now taken the seat of "co-conspirator" in your adventures from now on. What a blessing there is in His prescence. Something that Bill Johnson said last night keeps playing through my head, "being like a child" and "being like a warrior" are two different things, and I keep seeing them as a two step process. You there at His feet mourning the loss of Joe, gaining strength and courage and the confidence to go on so that you can then be the warrior. Me, too.

    Much love,